Game of Thrones S7 Ep6 Recap & Reactions

Bent Knees and Wicked Wights in “Beyond The Wall”

Jon Snow and his suicide squad team: Gendry, Thoros of Myr, Beric Dondarrion, The Hound and Tormund Giantsbane, leave the Nights Watch fortresses behind them and go out into the icy wilderness to nab a White Walker. Of all the ways this completely mental decision could go wrong, the first obstacle comes in the form of a very toothy, very angry, hulking polar bear-turned-wight.

Soooo it looks as though horses aren’t the only animals that can be transformed into Wights. This little thing called foreshadowing is anything but a warm and fuzzy teddy bear, when he barrels into the party, savaging Thoros. The Lord of Light doesn’t intercede to save his red priest from getting mauled up by Mr. Bear, but instead he relies on Beric and his mystical flaming sword to cauterize the wound-- aka his entirely shredded upper torso.

With that The Revenant mishap behind them, the Snow Squad presses onwards against the biting chill and eternal winter trying to scope out a White Walker straggler. During their march we get some banter between The Hound and Tormund, and are witness to Tormund crushing hardcore on Brienne: a Big Beautiful Woman he wants to make babies with. Awwww. I kind of totally support this pairing. Will it actually happen? Ehh. Brienne seems more of a solo gal, but who knows. Winter is here. Anything can happen. Just look at Bill Weasley and Fleur Delacour’s wedding in Harry Potter and the Deathly Hollows with the ceremony sandwiched in between relentless death eater attacks and Voldemort lashing out against muggles and magic folk alike. Maybe tying the knot is in the cards for Tormund and the Maid of Tarth.

Aaaaanyways, back to the task at hand, the group finally gets their Wight and in the process of snatching the thing, it lets out a bloodcurdling shrill cry, summoning forth legions of its White Walker brethren. With these frosty snow men rapidly creeping forward and closing in on the Snow Squad, we lose some faceless and generic cannon fodder characters -- like really, who the heck are these dudes who kept dying? Um did they truly willing volunteer for this barmy AF mission? Why do we care that they’re dying? Answer: We don’t. But Thrones writers clearly wanted there to be casualties. But casualties without consequence. I’m rolling my eyes a little bit at that logic, and it’s kind of an uninspired move on the part of the writers.

At any rate, Snow & Co. are able to smash apart part of the ice, leaving a watery gap between them and the White Walkers. Hilariously, many of them continue to shuffle forward and flop into the chasm, sinking into the water. With a large chunk of White Walkers down for the count, Jon and the guys are stuck on their little glacier. During the night, Thoros perishes from frost bite. This is one of the first deaths from exposure that we’ve seen in the show, and it means dire news for Beric-- this sixth life that he’s on is his last now that his resurrecting comrade is dead.

Hurling stones and chunks of ice at the Walkers, the Hound comes to the startling realization that the water dividing them from the snow zombies has frozen again. The Walkers notice this too, and with the Night King making his grand appearance, flanked by his other higher ups, they get back to storming the Snow Squad. A battle ensues, a hack-stab-slash free for all that has a couple of close calls.

Gendry is assigned the task to flee back to the Wall and get help. Finally, their abducted White Walker is hogtied and shut up, but it’s far too late to try to sneak away inconspicuously. The Night King is positively gloating.

Meanwhile, back at Winterfell Little Finger’s plan to pit Sansa and Arya against one another is playing out marvelously. Arya is disgusted and resentful of Sansa’s scroll to Robb -- it turns out that was the little parchment tucked in the bed seam -- urging him to swear fealty to Joffrey back in season one. Sansa protests that she was a just a girl and the Lannisters made her do it. Arya scoffs that Lyana Mormont is even younger now than Sansa was then. How would Lyana react to Sansa’s words, Arya wonders aloud, eyeing her sister with pure loathing. Sansa uncovers one of Arya’s own dirty secrets, her bag of faces. This OH SHIT, realization hits Sansa hard-- now both Bran and Arya are cray cray, bonkers, or nuttier than a fruitcake. Take your pick. The only sane Stark left is Jon, and of course he’s far far away.

After being threatened by Arya, and legit held up a knife point, with Arya saying she’d love to step into Sansa’s skin, and wear her pretty dresses, Sansa gets a raven from King’s Landing. Cersei is demanding she travel to the Red Keep to speak one-on-one. Sansa instead delegates Brienne to go in her place. This is the one woman who’s sworn to protect both Sansa and Arya, something Baelish confides to Sansa, when Sansa implies that Arya lost her shit and was fantasizing about cutting her down. So why is Sansa sending her packing? Ummmmm. More HORRIBLE decisions.

Speaking of decisions and acting in times of need, Dany gets word of the chaos and dire situation beyond the wall. Soaring on Drogon, with both Viserion and Rhaegal taking to the skies as well, the Mother of Dragons races North. Ignoring the advice from Tyrion to not act, Dany goes with her heart this time, and determinedly zooms onward to rescue Jon and his crew. For the first time, slicing through the sky, Dany lays eyes on the hordes of White Walkers. This. Just. Got. REAL.

Drogon and the other dragons breath down great gusts of fire onto the Wights, blasting out great chunks of their number. But as she did during the attack on the Lannister loot train, Daenerys stays in battle for far too long, getting cocky about invincibility while sitting atop Drogon. This time, Jon is another person that causes a hold up. He decides that now would be a good time to go after the Night King-- because killing him, means that all of the other Wights would no longer have a master and the entire ice zombie threat marching on the Seven Kingdoms would be eliminated in one fell swoop. Too good to be true? HELL YEAH. Get with the program Jon! Meanwhile, Dany is beyond reluctant to swoop right out of there with him still on the ground.

Jon’s foolhardy determination to snipe out the Night King comes to a screeching halt, when said Night King pulls up an icy lance, and hurls it through the air, piercing Viserion. HOLY MOTHER OF DRAGONS. It punctures right through him, killing him and sending his body spiraling down to the ground and crashing through the ice. And then there were two. *sniffles*

Dany’s look of terror and devastation is heartbreaking and she finally gathers up the squad, minus Jon, and gets the flying fawk out of there. The Night King raises up another lance, ready to stab it into a second dragon, but this time Dany and her dragon kiddos make it away.

Jon is on his own to fend off the Wights. That is until…..Uncle Benjen storms onto the scene on horseback! With swinging fire lanterns! And a sword! Yup! He’s back! And he starts fighting off the Wights, giving Jon an opening to get the hell out of there. Ummm, this is one giant WTF moment, and is sloppy writing. It’s obvious that Jon wasn’t going to get killed again. But being rescued last minute by his poofed-into-nowhere but suddenly back into the fray undead --maybe-- uncle reads like a bad fanfic. There was much eye rolling and UHHH WHAT laughter going on during this scene on my part and the other three people cozied up on the couch with me during our little Sunday night live viewing party. None of us were able to buy this kind of BS last ditch effort and erm for lack of a better phrase “godmodding”. What gives, writers?

Benjen hops off his very alive horse and screams at Jon to jump on a gallop his pretty little face out of there. Jon heeds his words, and Benjen gets swallowed up by the swarm of Wights. Half conscious, Jon makes it to the gates. When he wakes up, he finds himself abed on a ship headed for King’s Landing, with the abducted White Walker onboard ready to be signed, sealed and delivered to Cersei. Dany is in his room, and finally gets a good look at Jon’s bare torso-- more specifically the collection of scars and and stab wounds covering his skin -- and gets an inkling that maybe just maybe Davos’s comment that Jon took a knife in the heart maaaaay not be a figure of speech after all.

Dany now has an opportunity to grieve over her fallen dragon, and Jon, guilt-ridden and deeply sad apologizes for her loss. He also calls her by her nickname, Dany, which catches her off guard. Jon laughs off her stunned reaction, but then drops another bombshell on her-- is she ok with him calling her “my Queen” instead? AHHHHH!!! He’s too injured to physically get down and do the deed, aka physically bend the knee, but he tells her right then and there he’s now completely behind her. Jon is officially a part of Team Daenerys Targaryen, Stormborn, the Unburnt, Breaker of Chains, Mother of Dragons, and the rest of her enormous title. The sensual tension between them is still there. There’s a potent chemistry between the two, and they’re undeniably on the cusp of having some sort of hook up. Both clearly have feelings for the other and they’re keeping them in check, for now. And a kind of mutual respect is definitely developing between them. Sooo yeah Jon might get some from his paternal Aunt, but erm… Targaryens did marry brother-to-sister often after all, the biological bonds aren’t too taboo for Dany, who in the books was pretty much ok with having to eventually marry Viserys before he was crowned with his “gold” by Khal Drogo.

Our parting scene takes us back to the chilly North, where White Walkers heave-ho heave-ho row after row of chains, hoisting Viserion’s body out of the depths of the water. The Night King approaches the lifeless body. He touches his snout, and seconds pass before the dragon’s eyes snap open, revealing the piercing blue gaze, the hallmark of the Wights. As if the White Walkers weren’t formidable enough as it was. With an ice dragon in their ranks, we better hope that Dany and Jon can talk some sense into Cersei. . . . because as far as a song of ice and fire goes, Westeros is in for a deep freeze.

photos from IMDB.