What Vicky Is Watching

Trains, Masked Murderers & Dark Woods Disappearances

Shadowy secrets, high octane thrillers and a rising body counts. There’s definitely a theme in what I’m streaming and seeing on the screen!!!

In theatres: Murder on the Orient Express

This isn’t the first Agatha Christie book to be adapted into a film. Nor is it the first time her novel Murder on the Orient Express has made it to the big screen. Ever since Christie’s mystery novels featuring detective Hercule Poirot were published beginning in the 1930s, his adventures were an instant hit. Now, nearly 100 years later, Poirot is still alive and kicking. Directed by Kenneth Branagh and featuring a star-studded cast and lush visuals, Murder on the Orient Express is certain to make the brainy Belgian detective a household name once again. Branagh stars as the mustachioed hero and puts his theatre background to use once again with his lively portrayal. The cinematography is wondrous to behold. The design of the train and its sleeper carriages and various other cars instant spirits us away to another era-- and gleams with glamor and elegance.

There’s something romantic about the passengers, all on journeys of their own traveling together and coming together in this sleek space. Interacting, some more ahem...intimately than others… while on their way to their destination. Each of the passengers has something that emphasizes their character. There’s the matriarchal and fabulously wealthy dowager and her beloved pooches Princess Dragomiroff (the indomitable Judi Dench). A reclusive young Count and Countess: Ruldoph (Sergei Polunin) and Elena (Lucy Boynton) Andrenyi. A timid and reserved young missionary named Pilar (Penelope Cruz), and many other passengers in the supporting cast. The ones that get the most screen time and have the most formidable on screen presence are a young former governess, Miss Mary (played with great earnestness by Daisy Ridley), a thuggish business man, Edward Ratchett (Johnny Depp)  with a scarred face and harsh tongue, Ratchett’s secretary, bookkeeper and personal assistant Hector MacQueen (Josh Gadd) and a wealthy blond flirt Caroline Hubbard (Michelle Pfeiffer) who’s seizing her opportunity to travel and break from the routines of her normal life.

When a threat on Ratchett’s life is carried out one night, and his body is found viciously stabbed in his bed while his sleeper compartment was locked from the inside  Poirot sets out to discover which of the passengers committed the crime of passion.

As the luxury train hurtles down the tracks towards its destination Poirot investigates each and every one of the men and women aboard, and wrestles alibis, secrets and lies out of each of them. The carriages, once so grand become more confined and claustrophobic as the stakes rise and Poirot nears on his suspects. The action and humor here really do shine amongst the drama and thrills, and emotionally Murder on the Orient Express is a win. Although this wasn’t quite enough to make us forget Sherlock, it’s still a display of some extraordinary sleuthing if one can find the slightly far-fetched ending possible, and Branagh’s forced French accent tolerable.  

On cable: Riverdale

Actors, writers and showrunners teased that this would be the darkest and sexiest season yet of the Archie comics inspired teen drama on the CW. While what’s been delivered somewhat is what was promised it’s also a far cry from the promising premier episode and the adrenaline rushing and compulsively watchable back half of season one. The prominent film noir elements that were such a major part of season one are more muted here, taking away from the character of Riverdale. The “town with pep” is once again at the centre of a very nefarious plan being carried out by The Black Hood.

This enigmatic vigilante targets sinners in his quest to purge Riverdale of it’s lies and punish those who continue to use their deceit as a shield. This masked mystery man communicates largely through phone calls with Betty Cooper, and letters sent to his potential victims. His manipulation and mind games are the highlight of the show. If only the other elements that make up Riverdale could follow suit….

The protagonists this season, our fierce foursome: Veronica, Betty, Archie and Jughead are not only out of character more of than not, but they make moronic decisions after moronic decision. Some of the eye-rolling and cringey, groan-inducing moments come from the canned dialogue that occasionally comes out of their mouths -- I’m looking at Archie here-- and from performances that just don’t stick. Once again, looking at Archie.

Back in season one, he was a very one dimensional, and often angsty and whiny character. It’s doubled in this season, and of all the characters he’s had the least amount of growth. The only asset about him that keeps getting reinforced time and time again is that he’s totally built. He’s got rocking abs, and a handsome face, and the body of a 25 year old athlete. But he’s got nothing much going for him personality wise, other than he’s stubborn, impulsive, and in lust with Veronica.

The first couple episodes of this season did show us a frayed and unraveling Archie, a teen on the verge of a breakdown, and KJ Apa’s performance was gripping and convincing. But he quickly reverted back to the same cocky, dim and thirsty Arch from the first season. Yes, he may be hot, but that’s about it.

Another element that’s dragging Riverdale down this season is the absurdity. So much of this is soapy and over the top-- from Alice Cooper’s sudden MILF transformation, to Kevin (Casey Cott) trying to find hook ups in the forests of all places and getting pissed at his former-bestie Betty for being concerned that he could, you know, get stabbed or raped or left for dead, in his gleeful desire to have sex with whoever he stumbles upon in the forest. UHM. WHAT?! Are they no gay bars or clubs or hell, even strip malls or shopping centres in a town or two over? Kevin has a car. He can drive to places where meeting other dudes is the norm, not go sprinting through the woods like a cat in heat-- which is idiotic AF.

The storyline and world building leaves much to be desired as well.

The Black Hood and the Penny Peabody plots are the only ones that stand out amongst all the other tangled messes.

One of which is the whole South Side portrayal. This urban, low income territory is depicted in such a violent and negative light. Anyone who lives there is either a gang banger, drug dealer, or up to some shady business. The high school is gratified and overcrowded and has halls full of students shooting up and snorting Jingle Jangle and other drugs, and even the teachers couldn’t give a flying eff about who passes or fails, or even shows up. This chaotic and incredulous school is what a sheltered white suburbanite imagines low income and “tough” neighborhoods are like. There’s nothing gritty or realistic about it. It’s pure shock value. And totally unbelievable. And let’s be real, kind of offensive.

Keeping that in mind, there are some truly fascinating moments this season that keep me tuning in the new episode every week. FP’s (Skeet Ulrich) story arc, the return of the Hiram Lodge and how that changes the dynamic between Veronica and her mother Hermione, and how Hiram himself fits into Riverdale, and the ever intriguing Cheryl Blossom. A total scene-stealer and one of the most impressively written and performed characters in the entire series, Cheryl (Madelaine Petsch) is snarky and unstoppable, with some of the most hilarious opinions and lines. Her bizarre relationship with her mother Penelope promises more darkness to come, and her sudden interest and infatuation with Josie (Ashleigh Murray) is beyond intriguing. Riverdale, there’s still a chance for you yet!

Netflix: Dark

This moody German mystery/thriller premiered on Netflix the beginning of December. This simply named series features a small group of teenagers and their parents . It’s a small town missing persons case with a supernatural twist, much like Stranger Things, It, and even a wink of Twin Peaks. The first episode follows Jonas Kahnwald (Louis Hofmann) a teen who is hit by rampant anxiety after the graphic and sudden suicide of his father. He turned his pain inwards, and quietly and deliberately tries to keep his depression at bay, all while integrating back into his high school. His best friend Bartosz (Paul Lux) being a stand up bro, fudged about Jonas’s whereabouts-- saying his long absence was because Jonas had a sudden holiday in France to keep his reputation from being soiled.

The town is surrounded by dense woods and pocked with many caves and outcroppings, there’s a lot of unexplored territory, and a foreboding almost fairytale sense that their are wolves and other beasties beyond the town limits. The town is already on edge after the disappearance of a boy from Jonas’s class, Erik Obendorf. The many adults in the town are also all thrown out of sorts. Erik’s parents aren’t the only ones who demand answers-- many of the other residents, like Bartosz’s mother, Regina, an innkeeper, feels both unsafe and hit by economic hardships-- because who wants to visit a place where such disturbing things have happened?! The creepiness is intensified by a batty elderly man, who roams the streets, clearly escaped from his nursing home, and seemingly in a trance repeats over and over again, “It’s going to happen again.”

The ties between the characters is a key part of this show and the story. Each of them has their lives intertwined with the other-- two of the teen protagonists parents --one married, the other recently widowed--are having an affair; one is a police officer on the case looking for Erik; and another has ties to a formerly missing boy who was notoriously never found, and it goes on.

These ties also exist between Jonas and his friends. His best bro is now dating the girl Jonas had his eyes on and had feelings for, Martha, who along with her brother Magnus and kid brother Mikkel (Daan Lennard Liebrenz), are the children of the cop-- Ulrich Nielsen (Oliver Masucci).

The tale takes a turn for the worse, when one night, the friends, with Mikkel in tow, decide to sneak out to the forest where Erik kept his stash-- money, drugs, whatever else he wanted to hide away from prying eye. But when they arrive they find his secret hoard has already been snatched up by another. A sudden fright scatters the group, sending them all scrambling to get away in torrential rain. In the fray, Mikkel is split from the others, disappearing into the tangled wood.

The old man’s premonition comes to pass, when Mikkel vanishes without a trace. The frantic searches to find him yield little results. Even when the police, and Mikkel’s own father, head the search and comb through all the brush and trails, the boy isn’t there. But the gruesome remains they do uncover sparks up new questions and the stirrings of a new panic. However the first episode of Dark is no scream-your-lungs out horror experience. It’s actually quite subdued, and times slow and wandering. It might try the patience of some viewers, and with characters who haven’t yet been fleshed out quite yet, this isn’t a show with instant gratification. It quietly sinks in, and descends upon you, leaving you with a twinge of unease. The first episode doesn’t end with a cliffhanger, but instead a tease. . . will your curiosity get the best of you?